Girls straightjacketed by thoughts! By Yumna Bint-e-Iftikhar

Girls straightjacketed by thoughts!


Educating the Educated!!! Blessing still is considered a curse! Is having a daughter really unfortunate??? Do people still fear to have daughters??? Well fatefully yes!

Few days back when I heard women scarily talking about having a daughter, I realized that still we need awareness among people and need to educate the so called educated society. Still parents feel fearful of giving birth to daughters just because they are not boys. Huh… is it really a curse being daughter? Well actually it’s not at all. We cannot generalize. There remain thousands of families who don’t want girls as their children. The thing that saddens me is even the well educated people come up with such statements that are ludicrous to hear. It makes me wonder about those women wanting to have boy children that what actually has been as bad for her being in the journey as a girl?

The experience of being a girl for me has been wonderful so far and I adore myself. I have been through the time when I looked more like a tomboy, fought with my mother for every little thing I wanted to have, grew up as a girly girl, teased my father hilariously and notorious all the times with siblings; be it brothers or sisters. It’s fantastic to be a girl for me and I feel blessed. What could be more interesting than following my passion in the longer run?? I would have been a scared girl! Yes… So scared…. if I had not been strong, if I did not value myself, if my parents did not teach me to be good to others, to work hard to achieve what I want, if they had not believed me to take wise and right decisions and to make me feel like I can always talk to them about anything that is bothering me. The same thing goes for my brother as well. I do not have any fear.

They should know that girls now days are doing wonders if they are given freedom and trust from her acquaintances. Embarrassingly I think people feel more comfortable when they are having boys as children. I accept that all parents want to give their sons the best of everything and it’s not bad at all. They just want to provide everything comfy in the first half of life but does seeing them speaking preposterously with the family and friends, watching them silently taking drugs after winning family trust, seeing them act obnoxious completely, observing them passing disrespectful compliments to other girls out and humiliating and shaming family reputation by doing impertinent deeds make them feel so much happy and proud?? Well I doubt that…

Awkwardly today the looks of boys are modern no matter what they are, what they do and wherever they go but many of them are nothing but a burden on earth seriously. Allah has blessed us all with different things for sure. There is no back button to change something if you don’t like. You get what you get and you should not be ashamed of anything from his bestowal. If he blesses you with daughters instead of sons then don’t mourn on it rather take that time to mentor. Of course it will not change a girl into a boy but you will have a child who will respect and admire you for bringing up in superb way possible and thus it will give you such memorable moments to cherish for the years to come, your nurturing will benefit you in future n matter if it’s for a boy or a girl. It is so important to do because if you will not do it then no one else will do it for you and your child thus will not receive your assistance in any way otherwise.

I still see parents having no or little broadmindedness to accept what their daughters are capable of, they want to lead their daughters’ lives just the way they want to, because the thing keeps haunting their minds is what the so called society will think actually if they will start to appreciate girls for their very own existence. Needless to say still we dearth those fathers who think their daughters as princesses.

Luxuriously adopting a lavishing up to the minute lifestyle and wearing trendy designer clothes doesn’t make one modern by thoughts.

Nature isn’t cruel at all…Girls are each wonderful!

Cheers to all girls reading this out….. 🙂


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  1. January 13, 2015 at 4:59 pm — Reply

    Raising voice on the topic of gender discrimination is the need of the time. I appreciate your effort for doing your part to fulfill the need of the time. Every girl should be given her due rights as she deserves.

    However, it is very sad and embarrassing that the author of this article has herself discriminated between gender while writing against gender discrimination. I will most humbly shed some light on the parts of the article that are subjected to ‘Gender Discrimination’.

    1. The author has shared the view in third paragraph that parents provide best possible facilities to boys but it has an opposite result on the upbringing of boys and they lack manners, do drugs and speak ill about girls.
    This argument lacks any logical reasoning. Why would good facilities always have a negative result? What have bad manners to do with providing facilities? Are bad manners not result of less focus on ethics in upbringing? Are the facilities in upbringing a leading factor for doing drugs in young boys or broken home and girls are leading factors for drugs in early ages? If parents were keen enough to provide facilities for learning but they didn’t teach moral values to their boys so that they don’t speak ill about girls why parents are not to be blamed but the boys?
    The answers to the above questions will clearly show that the view of author is based purely on her experiences and observation only and the argument has no weight-age of logical reasoning or any statistical data.

    2. Fourth paragraph contains a view of author in the opening lines that most of the boys today have modern looks but they are burden on earth.
    Now lets us see if this argument has any rationality attached to it. The question arises what definition of ‘modernity’ the author has. If looking stylish and following up to date fashion of dressing and grooming is the definition of modernity in the view of the author then perhaps ‘fashionable’ is a more appropriate word. If the author means that having a higher level of intellect and staying within the social and ethical limits and behaving like a civilized person is ‘modernity’ then how can that be contained in the “looks” while they are more likely to be observed in the actions and words of the today’s so called ‘modern boys’.
    The author also thinks that many of today’s modern boys are a burden on earth. The humble question to be asked here is that which modern looks made them a burden on the earth? What is the connection between being modern and being burden on earth? Can person who isn’t modern not be a burden on earth? How can a person be categorized as burden on earth is there any standard or scale employed by the author for this hypothesis?

    The arguments of the author haven’t been criticized but they have been seen in the perspective logical reasoning which reveals that they lack logical and statistical validity. Thus, this proves that the author has stereotyped the male gender generally and boys specifically based on personal understanding. It is my humble view that a wider sample size for the observation is likely to change the understanding.

    We should spread awareness of eliminating gender discrimination and giving rights to each gender. But that should be done without invoking sentiments against the opposite gender.

    – Luqman Khan

  2. yumna
    January 17, 2015 at 4:53 pm — Reply

    Thats why I wrote we cannot generalize…..
    secondaly it lacks statistical evidences bcz its not a research paper with strong logical background but a piece of free writing… 🙂

  3. wehans
    January 23, 2015 at 12:27 pm — Reply

    Am a foreign student in Pakistan and what i have learned is that, its not all about the parents but the society itself, Parents however unlucky they think to have a girl they will still educate their daughters and give them all types of necessary tools to be successful but how about the general view of women. they are seen as second class citizens when it comes to employment and public participation. When they get married majority don’t fulfill their profession dreams but became limited to their households, a Good examples is, there are high rate of female medical student in institutions while the same is not reflected in the number of practicing doctors. Male counterparts seeing them as sex tool or not judged according to their intelligence but how good looking she is. And many more that prejudices girls.

  4. February 2, 2015 at 4:10 pm — Reply


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