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How I Learnt To Cling to My Imperfections

How I Learnt To Cling to My Imperfections

I opened my eyes with the shrill sound of the alarm. It was half past 5 in the morning. I stepped out of my bed and went to the washroom. Straight after 30 minutes my sister started to knock at the door “what are you doing inside from last one hour?” I came out with the stern face “I took just 30 minutes” I said correcting her. She went inside frowning at me. Next half hour I spent getting ready for university so I put the eyeliner on, the only thing I am expert at, made myself chilled strawberry shake. It was the 10th time that I got succeeded in making an ‘effortless, perfect Messy Bun’. Putting on my newly bought shoes, I was ready to go. As I was about to leave my mom stopped me and asked me to change my shoes. “It’s raining outside, those are not suitable for this weather”. I rolled my eyes up because I was not in the mood to give up on them. I kissed her on the cheek, “it’s going to be okay, don’t worry”.

As soon as I reached the bus stop I realized what a big mistake I had made. My shoes were filled up with the water but now I was not able to go back and undo it for my bus had arrived. A tall girl shoved me aside and so I was the last to get on the bus. All the seats got filled up before I could take one and I had to go standing in the bus. My day was already made. I was irritated to the extent that I could possibly throw someone out from the window and sit on the vacant seat but I was too shy to do that. I put on my earphones and started listening to Titanium with full volume. Finally, I was in university. I started looking for my best friend and there I saw this handsome guy standing under the tree who was trying to avoid the rain. I skipped a heart beat when our eyes met for a few seconds and then immediately this thing struck my mind that I was surely not his type because I was too imperfect for such perfection. Rejecting my own self, I shook my head and went on to meet my best buddy.

 

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Following that day, I had a presentation which I perfectly sucked even after preparation. I just realized that I am good for nothing. I went to café to get myself a drink but at that very place I lost my written assignment which I was supposed to submit that day. Is there anything in the world that I can do perfectly? I asked myself if I was having a bad day but my inner voice said ‘No this is how you are everyday’. Thanks heavens I have a very encouraging inner goddess within myself!

In the off time, I was able to get myself a seat. I took out the book which my friend handed over to me the same day and started reading. Few moments later I felt as if someone was constantly staring at me. I looked up and a found a girl looking at me weirdly and then the book I was up to. I got that she was staring at the book title’s page. So what if it was Fifty Shades Of Grey in my hands? Ah people need to stop being so judgmental I thought in my head. I gave up reading and looked outside the window. I was preparing myself for the long lecture I was to get from my mom for not getting properly dressed for the rain and the same happened.

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It was seven in the evening when my sister woke me up, “wake up you lazy butt, your friend is on phone.” I went to receive the call and it was my dear old friend on the other side. “Hey! I hope you are doing great. I was missing you.” She said in a numb voice. “You were right, nobody is perfect it’s just that you have to believe in yourself and give your best and that you should make yourself better than yesterday. Had you not motivated me when I lost myself I would have not been able to prove myself today. Thanks to you I have won my dreamed scholarship! Her words were striking my mind I wondered if I had said those words to her. I congratulated her and hung up.

I went out in the dark night to explore the light I had lost within myself. How could I forget my own words that nobody is perfect! Walking past by the muddy path I realized that my imperfections are what I truly am. They make me unique from others and I shouldn’t be ashamed of my imperfections in this imperfect world. That day I promised myself that I will hold myself to the standard of Grace, not Perfection because now I knew that Imperfections are more perfect than perfection itself!

Written By: Farwa Jasmeen

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